Wednesday, September 15, 2010

The Glass

  • The pessimist says the glass is half empty.
  • The optimist says the glass is half full.
  • The scientist says the class contains 50.12 mL of liquid, and is filled to about one half its maximum capacity.
  • The engineer says that there's a waste of volume.
  • The politician says that, if elected, he will make sure the glass is full.
  • The surrealist says something about llamas under his breath, fills the glass with motor oil, and drops in a dead goldfish.
  • The Dadaist says the glass is an artistic statement.
  • The economist says that the quantity of liquid demanded is greater than the quantity of liquid supplied, and raises the price of liquid in the glass until quantity demanded equals quantity supplied.
  • The communist says the contents of the glass is unfairly distributed, then pours its contents into many smaller glasses.
  • The opportunist drinks whatever's in the glass.