Friday, May 14, 2010
Anything Spiderman can do, Batman can do better. This is scientific fact.
Spiderman climbs walls and swings between buildings. Batman does the same things, without being mutated by a spider bite. Spiderman has a "spider sense" that warns him about dangerous situations. Batman navigates the same dangerous situations, without the benefit of spider-enhanced reflexes, and does just fine. He's just that good. Plus, let's be practical. What does Spiderman do when a crime occurs in a suburban area? At the very least Batman has a car.
Also, Charlotte Bronte would love Batman. He's so dark and brooding. Just like Mr. Rochester.
Come to think of it, Batman's extremely similar to Mr. Rochester. They're both dark, brooding, and wealthy. They both have dark secrets (Batman has a secret identity, Mr. Rochester has an insane wife in his attic). The both traveled across the world attempting to discover themselves after traumatic life incidents (Batman's parents died, and Mr. Rochester has an insane wife in his attic.)
Batman: Dark, brooding, mysterious, awesome-and-doesn't-need-a-radioactive-spider-bite.
Mr. Rochester: Dark, brooding, mysterious, has-an-insane-wife-in-his-attic.
Spiderman: Kind of lame.